Monday, May 10, 2010

Day 36

“When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.”


SO I got back pretty late last night.. only to have reality hit me right in the face... Have you ever been so wrapped up in your own life and your own goals you sometimes tend to forget the people around you? Well, That’s exactly how I feel.. I feel that I've been obsessing on working out and my own future plans that I forget to include the most important of my life. I'm not sure if he'll ever read this but for what it’s worth I'm sorry.

This leads me to a great tip of the day..

Juggling your personal life and your outside life is hard.. But there comes a balance somewhere in there.. Your job is to find that balance. My whole life I've tried to make others around me happy.. I've been used and abused you name it, I would of always bent over backwards even for strangers.. I always put myself last.. But now that I'm finally doing something for myself, I notice others hating on me.. My friends aren't as supportive as before I'm actually shredding the pounds.. My parents are still negative nacies..

I don't have a set cure for you to just balance out everything, that we have to fine on our own.. And today that’s exactly what I'm going to do.. Re-do my future plans, and redo my goals..

Side Note - If you couldn't tell today, I'm not feeling the greatest.. but I'm still gonna kick my butt to work out.. My goal for this week is to work out 3 hours every day.. Also to get down to 120 lbs which is one of my goals..

It weird being at almost 160 before I couldn't even imagine this day, but honestly I don't feel anything.. I still feel fat.. I'm 124 and I feel like 134.. I hate how my body type is portraying this.. I look at oth
ers my weight and I don't even see an ounce of similarity.. why is that?? Well.. I know why.. Different bodies.. Different heights blah blah blah uhh Its stressful.. for tearsnomore87.. Kussy, she freaking looks amazing.. Why can't I look like that.. I need to break this chubby plateau of my genetics. Ugh.. Sorry for the negativity today... can't have em all right..

Peace & Love